How to identify a Yoruba demon
- Well carved beard
- Calm look
- Black Mercedes
- That Yoruba name
- The Yoruba boy swag
- The ultimate squad
He had it all! The Yoruba boy starter pack! 1,000! What was it about this guy that made me so uneasy? and why couldn’t I take my eyes away?
Our eyes meet and he returns my matching look with a daredevil smile…Oh! What nerve! I quickly avert my eyes …Who does this guy think he is? ..Mschew!
He starts to walk towards my direction, looking at me square faced in the eye and I start to feel my heart pounding…My inner self-squeals ‘OMG! he’s coming here”. Instead, he passes my table just to make conversation with the anorexic looking babe at my back. OK! Am pissed and I could not even
Hide it… As I stand up to leave my table, I feel a strong grip on my arm…’Where do you think you’re going?’…….I look back and all I could see is a full, pink lower lip and a very clean carved beard. Chineke! It’s him! ….Trying to keep my cool before I trip on my 5-inch heels…”I am sorry, do I know you?”
“No, am very sure you don’t but I really want to. My name is Oluwaferanmi”
And he really did get to know me. The aura of calmness around him should have been the red light for me but I just couldn’t resist. He just had this inexplicable resolve about him that made me want to jump through hoops for him, any time, any day.
‘Calm down, Baby girl’ Sewa, my bestie wasn’t having any of my gists. She just sat there looking at me like I am some kind of mumu.
‘You know he would only break your heart right? So why are you going with it?’
The simple fact that I could not answer that question made it ring in my head for days.
What exactly is it about these Yoruba boys?
You know how girls just love bad boys, Yoruba demons embody all the badness! All the bad boy streak! Why else would they be called ‘demons’?
They just always know the right thing to say at the right time. Even if you are wise enough to know it’s a lie, you still want to laugh and smile like a BOLO. You still tend to fall or want more of the words they are dishing. They know it, they know you know it, they know you like it and they know you would always be back for more. It’s pure mind fuckery… Trust me!
They look harmless and sincere. Even those with the bad boy look, beards and all have a certain sincere aura about them.
Knowing that 90percent of girls love romance, they prey on it! These Yoruba demons would stop at nothing just to wine, dine and…..EAT you! They are romantic to a fault. they would pop gifts at your door, just because….. Leaving you fantasizing about how caring, sensitive and loving this “Femi” guy…not to say that there aren’t romantic guys out there o!…. but damn! Yoruba demons are smooth Casanovas. There is no limit to a Yoruba demons’ spending. Even if his goal is to “hit and quit that” you would sha get some of the finest trips in town.
They have this cool, calm and collected aura about them and they play these qualities to the fullest. The ones that are not totally handsome have this confidence about them that totally makes up for their “normal” features.
These Yoruba demons pride themselves in their ability to possess and conquer even the most independent, unwilling chick that has seen it all. They are mighty fine, dressed to perfection with their killer smiles and ever so evident sophistication. They are the everyday woman’s dream (you really can’t deny) but most often than none, this dream ends in a nightmare with hearts all over the floor (the girl’s especially).
It is no surprise that these fickle men would not bother to look at the good inside if they are not interested in the package as to them a girl’s packaging is everything! These Yoruba demons don’t joke with their look or the big boy impression they are trying to portray so they tend not to go for anything less.
One really funny thing they do after they get to “hit and quit that ” is to act like it’s your fault they are leaving you. They guilt trip you so much so that you start thinking you have serious issues. The really crafty ones would come up with different excuses like; “Oh baby, I have issues with commitment”….The ever popular “it’s not you, it’s me” line or the “Am still working on myself”….”I don’t think I deserve you”… “I think I’m limiting you”….”you deserve better”… “Let’s take it slow”…..LOL!…Who says these?!!! They would never know all these before they hit that o…hehe! smh!
If you are still interested in nailing a Yoruba demon, please, guard yourself, defenses up all the way till the end! Remind yourself not to get your heart broken. Be a bad ass bit** yourself. Let him do the chase, catch his attention and know what to do with it, till you observe if he’s for real but before then, basically lean back (in Fat Joe’s voice) and enjoy the ride!